DEALING WITH YOUR EMOTIONS

DEALING WITH YOUR EMOTIONS

Let me share with you briefly on controlling your emotions as shared at September edition of S.E.A.L.

7 Tips to controlling your emotions.
1. Control your emotions by looking ahead: before you react, you think of what will happen the next few hours after you have acted, how and what impression will people have about you.
2. Get to know your self: don't pretend the emotions are not there because all of us are emotional beings. Know when you are emotional and why the emotion is at play at the particular point in time.
3. Change your mood, do something different: when you discover that you become emotional especially when they are negative (like anger, envy, jealousy etc), get to change your mood and do something different at that point in time.
4. Observe how others deal with their emotions effective: be watchful and see those who effectively manage their emotions and learn from them by asking them questions.
5. Change you physiology: when your emotions are at play, change your composition, make up as you react. As emotions are physical responses to issues, you need change your physical response to what comes your way.
6. Use your brain: don't always act without thinking. It is better you think before acting than acting before thinking which brings about regret later on.
7. Create spare capacity in your life: because you will always get emotional, work on yourself by creating more capacity in your life to allow for differences in people and in relationship.
With these tips, you can become a controller over your emotions and not the opposite. So many are controlled by their emotions and later regret their actions and finds it difficult to relate with people. Imagine a woman that slapped her husband in the public, and the man in response to that with uncontrollable anger (emotion) beat and naked the wife openly and even dragged the woman home. What impression have they created for themselves in that neighbourhood with uncontrollable emotions?

To manage your emotions further, let see these tips:
* Recognize and understand your own emotions as well as your partner's - we are all emotional beings.
* Always determine the source of your feelings
* Talk about your feelings with each other
* Always acknowledge that your feelings and that of your partner are legitimate and treat as such with control-able approach
* Express your feelings to each other but not in a confrontational way
* Try as much as you can not to react emotionally to your partner's emotional outbursts
* Use gestures like apologies, sympathy notes, shared meals, hand shakes to diffuse negative emotions at a little cost
* Use transformative mediation, dialogue and other problem solving method to deal with highly emotional conflict.

You can live above your emotions (control) if you put somethings in place in your life. When you don't give answer to stupid questions does not mean you don't have an answer or know what you should say, it only shows how matured you are.
Learn and be wise, get matured and live peacefully with others (your partner inclusive).

Pastor 'Wale D. Adekanye
S.E.A.L. Host